Friday, October 14, 2005

Edge of the abyss

The PhD deadline is getting closer and closer and I'm getting ever more stressed. It's a bit strange really as I'm not the sort of person who gets stressed about anything really but now I don't feel like I can do anything as I have the constant worry of finishing the PhD gnawing away constantly at the back of my brain. I wish I had more real life friends, I realised that I haven't spoken to anyone outside work except the live-in boyfriend for a week. It doesn't really help that my closest real life friends are all suffering serious PhD stress as well and we haven't had a non-PhD related chat for months now.

I can't wait until I've finished the PhD. It occured to me yesterday just how much it has taken over my life at the moment. Every time I speak to someone it is invariably about my PhD. I don't especially want to go on about it but there seems to be absolutely nothing else in my life right now.

I still don't know what to do with myself once I've finished. I've (mostly) worked so hard over the past 3 years to learn all sorts of crazy new stuff and understand my PhD topics I feel like I could do anything. There seem to be so many different options and I have no idea what would be best for me and I'm so worried I will make the wrong decision.

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